I asked myself this question several times this past month. And it's probably in the same way most moms think of failing. Am I juggling enough? I complain to other moms of all the running I have to do, plus kid activities and personal ventures. However, to really stop and think, I don't have anything on my plate. My evening are typically pretty low key, filled with homework, chores and dinner.
My calendar isn't full and I'm not driving across town multiple times a day, missing one child's sport in order to drop another off at a practice. Not even on my busiest day. Yet I still get caught up in the "poor me" trap, stressing that I'm juggling too much, when in reality it's almost nothing. And that's what makes me feel like I'm failing, miserably. I watch mom's with just as many kids juggle three sports, school activities, full time work AND their house is clean. My house is a mess, my kids activities rarely ever cross paths and I don't work.
Where am I going so horribly wrong? Why can I not master this balancing act? Am I failing as a mom?
I know, never compare yourself to anyone. But I do! It's human nature to want to be as good at something as our peers. There are days that I wish people could look at and me and see a mom who's doing it all. I am totally not, by the way. But the question at hand, am I failing? Is all the running and juggling and balancing worth it? Am I missing out on a full mom life? Is it normal for a mom of 4 to clean house, kids to and from school, sports, music, and friends (and all the other crap we allow our kids to become involved in) completed in a day?
Well I don't know about you, or Mrs. Smith, but I'd rather be failing as a mom, than run around like a mad woman. Do my kids play sports? Do my kids have school related activities? Do we go to friend houses and birthday parties? Yes, but I plan my days according to them. I may have panic attacks about what is going to happen on such days, but I try my hardest not to juggle too much. If that is failing, then I will own it!
Props to the ladies (and gentlemen) who can balance 3 sports, music classes, dance classes, and all that other junk. High fives for having a clean house and laundry put away. As for me, yay me, the kids are alive! I will continue to fail, a lot. I will not over schedule myself or my kids. I may have busy days where there is little peace for me, but at least it's only a couple of days. And the laundry will be clean, just not folded and hung. As for the house, HAHAHA, maybe when they move out.
My kids and I will survive, even if I'm failing as a mom
I'm sorry if you came looking to get tips on how to be a better mom. My only tip to anyone is- Do what YOU can handle! Other moms out there may have it all together (or at least look like it) but they are not you, and you are not them. Some of us are wired to handle more, I'm not one of those! Own your flaws and fails, and stick your tongue out to those who scoff at your less than crammed schedule, and be proud to be a failing mom somedays!